The Biggest Loser

Last night's American Idol featured the abysmal auditions of wanna-be pop stars who were missing something - looks, talent, confidence, a decent wardrobe. The show's producers are counting on our need to feel better about ourselves at someone else's expense with these Auditions From Purgatory shows. Last night's show could have been called "Ain't Too Proud To Beg". There were a number of people that pled their case for stardom with the same kind of urgency you'd see from someone begging not to be sent to the electric chair for their unpaid parking tickets.

"Man, I'm glad I'm not like those losers," we smirk. "Don't they know they stink?"

Well, some of them do, but a lot of them have had their friends and family tell them they're awesome and amazing and a way, way, way better singer than [fill in the blank with the name of your favorite season 1-5 American Idol]. And then Simon pulls out his Uzi and guns them down. Some would say it's a mercy killing...and maybe it is.

But I wonder what's happened to some of those failures. No, not the extreme cases the producers cherry-pick for our public consumption. But the rest of those thousands of people who showed up at the nationwide cattle calls and were sent home by some assistant to the associate junior producer after singing 4 bars of a song they'd been rehearsing for weeks. The whole thing goes on their failure resume.

Then there was this one guy auditioning last night who got to the Hollywood round of the competition last year and then bailed right there on stage. Couldn't hack the pressure. And everywhere he went, he had people asking him, "Hey aren't you the one that quit?" The Failure Factor had come to define his life. It had become his identity.

Today, blogger king Dan Edelen writes about how desperately we Christians need a gospel of failure. Man, do I agree with him! I hope to be exploring this topic in blog posts to come.

But for today, I just want to make an observation. In Uprooted, I tell the story of these two women I once worked with who NEVER HAD ANY PROBLEMS. This wouldn't have been much of a problem if we'd been employed at McDonalds (in fact, it probably would have made working together quite pleasant) - but we worked at a church. Though church is supposed to be a place for people with problems, we all know that it freqently is a place we find ourselves auditioning for our own version of Spiritual American Idol.

Again and again, I heard from the people-with-problems who attended the church - "Those women make me feel like I'm a loser." The irony is that the women were perfect examples of what we frequently tell each other the abundant, victorious Christian life is supposed to look like. And as a result, the women served as a kind of defacto Randy, Paula and Simon judgment panel for the church, since they had perfected their own performances so well.

Man, we need some new paradigms.