It's Worshiptainment!

Picture this with me: a church's worship team on a float in a parade. The float's speakers are blaring out the latest Christian music Top 40 hits. The team is smiling and waving to the crowd...maybe even karaoke-singing along as the float crawls up the parade route. The float features a sign with the name, slogan, address, phone number and website of the church, along with a mention that their team does WORSHIPTAINMENT. They have a kickin' team, covering your favorite worship songs...every week!

I'm not making this up.

I'm not going to engage in a rant here, because I think most of you reading this are probably 90% gone, mentally riffing on this horrifying word, saying the same things I did when I heard about this.

I have to give the worshiptainment team props for at least coming right out and being honest about who they are. I've known more than a few worship teams...and choirs, for that matter...and middle-aged women doing "special music" during the collection time...that are doing worshiptainment. They just don't call it that.

I'm a big fan of excellence, and relevance, and the vertical thrust in worship music that helped a lot of us understand how to sing TO God, rather than singing information about Him to one another, which is what a lot of church music always seemed to be. My heart has been changed by encountering the presence of God in corporate worship.

His presence isn't always accompanied by music, of course. But I'm specifically thinking about corporate experiences I've been in places where a roomful of people has had to stop singing because God's presence was so overwhelming.

I've seen worship bring order to the chaos and confusion in an Altzheimer's unit. I've been in a small group, praying, and together we've spontaneously, and off-key, begun singing a song of praise. A response. Humility. Invisibility. Beauty.

An offering, our gift. To Him.

Rather than wringing your hands about the $nature$ of the modern worship movement, consider this question: Have you ever been in a corporate worship setting and experienced the presence of God?

If the answer is no, ask God to show you what it is like to have heaven touch earth during a time of corporate worship.

If the answer is yes, remember it today. Let it spoil you for the hollow substitute called worshiptainment.

Why don't you look into Jesus? He's got the answer

Rest in peace, Larry Norman.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TliWDSLrYb8
Click on the above link for some vintage footage.

Back in the saddle in my PJ's

I am facing the most intense writing deadline I've encountered in about a year. This means that I go to my default "backed into a corner" writer's mode for a short amount of time. Whoever said a writer's life is glamorous outghta come over here and see how its done in real life.

On second thought, don't come over here until after 1 or so. That's usually when I get around to brushing and flossing my teeth.

Let me give you a sample of what comes before and after that big highlight of the day when I'm looking at an overwhelming deadline.

7:15 a.m. - Roll out of bed. The sound of me using the bathroom alerts the cats to run to my closed bedroom door and mewl desperately. Apparently, they're starving again, just like they were last night at dinner.

7:20 a.m. - Silence cats with two packets of food. Hit the "start" button on the coffeemaker. Check e-mail. Turn on the morning news.

7:25 a.m. - Check e-mail again to see if anything new has come in. Check facebook. Read a couple of blogs. Check e-mail one more time, just to make sure. Get a cup of coffee.

8:00 a.m. - Turn off the TV. Check my e-mail again. Give myself a speech about getting to work. Open my Word file. Check my e-mail again. Nothing. Time to get to work.

8:01 a.m. - Which I do by surfing the internet.

8:15 a.m. - Time for another cup of coffee.

8:17 a.m. - Check my calendar.

8:18 a.m. - Go to facebook. I forgot to check my Scrabulous games. I am obviously a glutton for punishment (my record is like 4 wins and 23 losses right now), but for some reason, I like the game. And it feels really important that I play them RIGHT NOW.

8:30 a.m. - I look at my work again. Time to warm up that coffee.

8:32 a.m. - Bathroom break.

8:34 a.m. - I start writing, and think, "Wow, I've been working today for an hour already."

Eventually, I really do get down to work. I sit in my PJ's writing until noon, at which time I can't stand the furry feeling of my unbrushed, coffee-coated teeth one moment longer, so I exercise, shower, read my Bible and take a break mid-day. Dive in the rest of the afternoon, and start to feel a little punchy late afternoon. There might be a 15-minute power nap in there, and during the dinner hour, Simpsons/Seinfeld. TV viewing and more writing/e-mail checking/facebook updating in the evening.

That said, I'd value your prayers for faithfulness, worship and truth in my work as I push toward the finish line on this project.

Tests are fun! (Aren't they?)

When I was in third grade, before I took my first Iowa Basic test, I remember my teacher giving us a pep talk about the test. Besides the instructions about using our sharpened number two pencils to completely color the A, B, C or D circles, and erasing completely if we decided to change our answer, I'll always remember her telling us that tests were fun.

I bought her pitch - hook, line and sinker. I loved standardized tests, and though I was never a brilliant student (hated sitting in class), I usually tested well. Tests were fun!

Not long ago, my husband and I took an on-line theology quiz entitled "What's Your Theological Worldview"? (Bill, the leading theologian in my life, pointed out that the quiz-maker's biases and pet issues appear to be pretty obvious judging from the wording of some of the questions.)

In case you're wondering, I'll tell you how I scored at the end of this blog entry*.

But first, a thought about a different kind of test. Today after church, there was a brief meeting about a new partnership between the congregation and a sister school and church in Africa. We were told this isn't about going in there and doing projects. In fact, the people in charge of facilitating this partnership strongly cautioned the church away from doing projects, recommending instead our role is to form relationships and to learn.

I've served on missions committees before, even putting together some short-term missions trips - and years ago, met Bill at a church formed out of a missions training program. I've known lots and lots of cross-cultural missionaries, lifers. The thinking in my life, once upon a time, was that the Great Commission meant "doing missions". "Doing missions" was an acid test of spiritual committment among some of the people I've known. And though "doing missions" tends to patronize people and turns them into projects, that very American (and non-Biblical) thinking runs deep in us evangelicals.

Though I am not that person anymore, I realize that the real test of the Great Commission in my life might be the Great Commandment: to love God, heartsoulmindstrength - and to love others. In relationship, learning. The test doesn't come in setting and achieving measurable ministry goals.

It comes in washing someone else's feet, and allowing them to wash mine.

* Theological worldview quiz results:

89% Wesleyan/Holiness

79% Emergent/Postmodern

79% Fundamentalist

79% Charismatic/Pentecostal

75% Neo-orthodox

How someone can be equally emergent, fundamentalist and charismatic is beyond me. Maybe I need medication for this...

Read this

There is so much I could say about this post:
http://branthansen.typepad.com/letters_from_kamp_krusty/2008/02/kumar-sits-in-t.html#comments

But additional words are unnecessary. Go on wit ya. Read it.

A modest proposal for pastors

"How many you running at your church?"

The first time I heard one pastor ask another pastor that question, I remember my first reaction was instant nausea. My brain started deconstructing the question, which quelled my queasiness a bit, but only because I found a way to distract myself from the topic at hand. It also helped me keep my trap clamped shut, since I had been a peripheral part of the conversation.

I've heard lots of variations on this question over the years, and I've even asked it (while cringing) of a few pastors myself. The reporting of numbers is certainly of great value throughout Scripture, but most of the time, this "How many you running at your church?" question is not about reporting, but about comparing. Or competing. (It is also horrific grammar, but that's besides the point.)

I know there's a few pastors who read this blog from time to time. I'm grateful for that, and for your desire to care well for the people in your local congregation.

There are lots of reasons to track and even celebrate congregational numbers, but I would like to propose something to you when you gather with other pastors and church leaders - especially when you go to conferences and the like. Try to learn about other pastors' churches without asking the N Question - about "their" numbers.

"How is your church connecting with the needs in your local community?"

"How does your church relate to other congregations in your area?"

"How would you characterize your church's prayer life?"

"What signs of growth do you see occuring among those participating in the children's ministry at your church?"

"What is most exciting to you about what's happening in your church these days?"

"What do you do to take care of your own soul when things are challenging at your church?"

Now the other pastor may well respond with numbers - and use that weird southern phraseology to frame his/her answer: "We're running 400 kids in our Kid-A-Palooza Children's Program". But props to you for trying something new, and for opting out of the competition game.

Because no one really wins. Least of all, your congregation.

A Lenten Throwdown

My one of my favorite pit stops on the info superhighway is Scot McKnight's Jesus Creed Blog. (Can I see a show of hands? You too, right?) Thoughtful theological/eccelsiological/coffee/sports/Crocs discussion, emceed by a truly kind person.

Since today is day 1 of that 40 days of purpose leading into resurrection day - better known as Lent - I thought I'd share one simple and heart-breaking (in the best way possible!) suggestion to consider as so many who are a part of the church take stock of their need for a Savior during this season. Professor McKnight has a beautiful, simple suggestion for all of us, whether we're Lent Veterans or new to Lenten observance:

http://www.jesuscreed.org/?p=3384

Here it is:

Hear O Israel, the Lord our God, the Lord is One.
Love the Lord your God with all your heart,
with all your soul, with all your mind,
and with all your strength.
The second is this: Love your neighbor as yourself.
There is no commandment greater than these.